When Life Throws You Curves, Shift Gears - Meet Christine

Adapt and overcome: What is your new normal?

By Christine Rekash

Some of you may recall from several posts on the Support Network that I am a Heart Valve Disease Patient Advocate and Support Network Ambassador. A few months ago, I also gained insight into the role of a caregiver.

This past summer, my father received a total knee replacement and, more recently, had kidney stones removed. My mother has served as the primary caregiver during his recovery. However, during this process, I have found myself at times feeling as if the official roles of patient and caregiver have reversed.

When I was recovering from open heart surgery, he was a critical member of my support team. He was the one standing on the sidelines, encouraging me to fight with all my might, to put one foot in front of the other as I learned to walk again, when all I wanted to do was give up. I could not have stayed positive and upbeat without the compassion, love, dedication and support he provided. This time, he is the patient, and I am on the sidelines, but am I really able to relate? *

I can only share what I learned recovering from open heart surgery to repair a leaking valve. The experiences and surgeries are different. Yet, what I can share is the emotional side of being a patient. I can share the perspective that when life throws you curves, you must learn to shift gears.

Recovery from surgery, whether it is open heart, knee replacement, stone removal or any other, is never easy. Life is interrupted, routine is rearranged, and a patient's world is no longer the same. The question becomes: “How do I navigate in this new world?” I had to adapt and overcome and determine “what is my new normal?”

While it may sound quite simple, it can be quite challenging. As I reflect on my journey, I had to adapt when life threw me a curveball and the leaking valve required open heart surgery. For my father, as the aging process settled in and the knees slowly degenerated, it became a matter of having a choice, by electing to have the surgery and then adapting and overcoming.

My father, too, faced a range of challenges: physical therapy sessions, daily exercises, navigating compression stockings and compression cuffs, building the strength and mobility of his new knee. This is what became his new normal for the months of recovery.

I hit many speed bumps on my road to recovery: fluid around my heart, atrial flutter, an irregular heartbeat resulting in three cardioversions (procedures to restore normal heart rhythm), atrial fibrillation and a catheter ablation (a procedure to stop abnormal electrical signals in the heart), all within four months of the original surgery. I’d thought I would have this surgery, go through the healing process and be "fixed." I quickly had to learn how to overcome these obstacles. Swelling, weight gain, rapid heartbeat, restricted diet, bouts of lightheadness, fatigue and low blood pressure, just to name a few, became my new normal at various times during my recovery. Similarly, my father also hit speed bumps.

I recently found myself sharing my experience of the recovery process and comparing it to driving a stick shift (manual transmission) car. Some days, you will find yourself stuck in second gear. Other days you will start out with your foot on the gas and get all the way to fifth gear and cruise along for a few days. Then, just like that, you hit the brakes and you have to stop. Another roadblock gets in the way -- perhaps another surgery that will rearrange your already established routine, or perhaps another exercise pushes you beyond your limits to increase your stamina, or perhaps it is the fear of not being able to start again. The key is to reverse your mindset and adapt a positive attitude that you can! Next, put your foot on the clutch, switch gears and start again.

It is important to celebrate the small victories. Resilience is the key to recovery. Yes, resilience involves working hard, but it also requires one to stop, recover and then begin the hard work again. President Franklin D. Roosevelt made this expression famous in his 1933 inaugural address: “So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

I encourage you to keep on fighting and get back in that driver's seat and don’t let fear become the roadblock on your road to recovery. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Keep on going! Rest if you must, refuel, but don't you quit.

* While this inspirational message serves as an inside-out look from patient to caregiver, as a caregiver, you, too, must adapt and overcome. I have found that when there is nothing you can offer to help your patient or loved one other than yourself, and your presence, sometimes that’s all that matters.

February is American Heart Month. Whether you’re a patient or a caregiver, now’s the time to Reclaim Your Rhythm and take back control of your physical health and mental well-being.

Mitral valve regurgitation is a serious heart valve disease condition. Mark Your Calendars for Heart Valve Disease Awareness Day on Feb. 22.